A Bee Story

Once upon a time we came home from a long weekend in Fresno to discover dead bees all over the kitchen windowsill.  

This was disturbing for a plethora of reasons.  How did they get in?  The house was closed up all weekend.  If not from outside, where were they coming from?  And, as we were discussing these questions in the kitchen, we heard them.  The little buggers were living in the ventilation pipe in our range above the oven!  In the house!  Something had to be done.  In the meantime, we covered the end of the pipe so no additional little pests could escape into our humble abode.

Three days later

Megan: "Maybe we should smoke them out?  I'm sure bees hate smoke."

Matt: "I don't know about that..."

Megan: "Oh, come on!  I mentioned that to some people at work and they thought it was a fabulous idea!!"

Matt, never one to shy away from a challenge: "Okay, let's do it."

The supplies

The witnesses

The result

Four measly bees escaped through the top of the pipe! Four!

I walked inside, dejected, thinking my idea was a complete failure (which it was).  I found Matt standing in front of the oven with a terrified look on his face.  Matt, the man who has no fear and laughs in the face of danger.  This terrified me.  

Matt: "Listen!"

Megan, listening: "Those bees sound pissed!"

Matt: "They ARE pissed!  I woke the whole damn hive up!  Get the cat and the dog and get outside!  RUN!"

So, I ran, sure of the fact that a thousand bees were going to hunt me down and sting me to death.  Me, the person who has never once been stung and is sure that I'm deathly allergic.   The closest safe spot was the Cadillac, shining like a beacon in the driveway.  In we all went. 

And in we all stayed for 20 minutes.  Finally, Matt went in to make sure our house was safe.  It was.  He closed the hole back up and we proceeded to listen to the pissed bees for an hour or so until they all calmed down.  The next day we called the Bee Busters!  The exterminator said, "wow, they had really moved in."  And when Matt went up to clean out the vent, he found four large pieces of honeycomb and thousands of dead bees!

So, the moral of the story... always call the professionals!  

The End

:)